Sourpuss

I was the penalty tracker in this Saturday’s derby dolls game. Photographer Grant Palmer took this photo of me comparing penalty sheets with penalty box administrators Sweep-the-leg Johnny and Namaslay.

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I cannot stop laughing. MY FACE! I look like I am sucking on a lemon. (Click to embiggen.)

Day 16

I promise I will talk about something else eventually, but not today.

Because.

GRACE IS EATING A PULLED PORK SANDWICH.

Sure, I still haven’t convinced either kid to eat more than a bite of any vegetable. It’s still a win.

Day, um. 13ish.

Last night, as I was preparing dinner, Sam came into the kitchen and said, “Is that TOFU?” When I confirmed that it was, he said, “Can I HAVE some?” And I managed to say, “Just ONE piece” without dying from the suppressed laughter because OH MY GOD MY BOY ASKED FOR TOFU.

Dinner was sesame noodles, but I also put out a bowl of noodles with just soy sauce. Sam ate a quarter pound of tofu and Grace had half a chicken thigh, so I allowed them to choose which noodle dish they wanted, and they both chose soy sauce. I also made salad, and they both tried it. GRACE TRIED SALAD. AND LIKED IT. Apparently French vinaigrette (with Dijon mustard, wine vinegar, and olive oil) is MAGIC.

Not every meal has been this successful, but they have eaten more foods in the last two weeks than in the last two years.

Day 5

Today at lunch Sam said this:

“Well, I love trying new things!”

He then ate half a quesadilla, even though he did not particularly like it. IS THIS REAL LIFE?

Grace is still being a pain, but sliiiiiightly less of a pain? Maybe? Could be wishful thinking or resignedness.

I’ve added a second snack to our day. Four meals meant SO MUCH WHINING. Five seems more manageable.

For tonight’s dinner I am making Bread Alone baguettes and zucchini soup (kind of–I’m not following the recipe, just the basic idea). I know they will eat baguette. Will they eat a vegetable?

PLOT TWIST

Grace has been extremely reluctant to try new foods. Like, somehow simultaneously screaming her head off and clamping her mouth shut so nothing can pass her lips.

As a result, dessert following dinner as it does, she has not had any coffee cake. She has instead spent pretty much every waking moment begging me for coffee cake and failing to understand the natural consequence of not eating.

Sam has been splendid about trying new things. He ate a peanut butter and jelly sandwich earlier. JELLY. (Actually jam.)

Tonight, I made sausage sandwiches for Will and Sam, a veggie burger for myself, and a grilled cheese for Grace because dear god I just need her to be able to eat some fucking coffee cake and there was no way she’d try a sausage sandwich.

Sam, who does not like his precious spicy Italian sausage to touch anything else (even pasta), shivered and shook and guzzled water and didn’t eat until I literally hand fed him about half of his sandwich. He complained the whole time, but happily ate a pickle.

Grace chowed down on her grilled cheese, reluctantly tried a bite of pickle, was inordinately proud of herself for trying it, and then FINISHED SAM’S SANDWICH.

Bet you didn’t see that coming.

Picky is as Picky does.

My mom recently gave me a book called French Kids Eat Everything (affiliate link). I started reading it rather apprehensively, because I just can’t take one more smug parenting book about how I am doing it wrong.

It is not one of those books.

Basically, it’s a memoir of a North American family who move from Vancouver to the author’s husband’s home country of France, where the author is expected to feed her children the way the French feed theirs, which is…very very very differently than she is used to. And, well, it works. Her children develop better eating habits and more diverse palettes. In the book she lays out ten rules that she followed to achieve her goals, and gives tips and recipes to help others follow them.

What the fuck. I am pretty desperate.

DAY ONE

Today I informed the children that they will no longer be allowed to snack whenever they want to. One of the key principals in the book is that grazing on snacks all day leads to kids who aren’t hungry for meals. Seems legit.

I fed them (and myself) a good breakfast around 8-8:30. Baguette with butter (no butter for Sam–I will work on that aversion slowly), bacon for them, eggs scrambled with goat cheese for me, and a square of dark chocolate each. Coffee for me.

We went to the playground and then speech therapy. On the way to Pasadena, Grace started crying because she wanted one more turn on the swings. She demanded a food treat to make her feel better, and I informed her that we would no longer be using food to make ourselves feel better. I offered to read her books instead.

We came home and I made lunch: pasta and sausage, both favorites, but this time I mixed them together. It was on the table at about 1:00. Sam spent twenty minutes saying he just wasn’t sure he could eat them together. I ended up feeding him about half, then he had a bit more on his own. I let them be done when they felt full. I did not let them move onto the next course until they were both finished with the current one. After pasta (I had parmigiana on mine, which Sam shockingly tasted), I had a carrot salad. I insisted they each try one bite. Grace was the harder sell this time. Then we had a fruit course (apple and banana, Grace is not required to eat the banana because she is very averse to the texture), and then–and only then–they were allowed a popsicle.

It took an hour and a half and there were many tears.

Sam gets a video game on speech days. He ended up with only about 40 minutes because lunch took so long and I wanted the TV off for an hour before snack time. At 4:00 I gave them peanut butter pretzels and frozen strawberries (which they have never agreed to eat before, and which disappeared into Sam in five seconds flat).

I’ve insisted that they eat at the table, such as it is. (We are overhauling the apartment again, and our table is currently under a tarp on the porch. They ate at the coffee table.)

I’ve corrected their language about food fairly constantly. “No, thank you” is the only negative talk I will accept.

This is exhausting, and we still haven’t gotten to dinner.

Heartbreak; new dress and a trip; sorting

Last night I received the impossibly sad news that my friend Laurie has died. I am still reeling and can hardly believe it. She was the funniest, warmest person I knew. And oh, she loved Sam. Whenever she was down she would ask for a Sam story to cheer her up. She was also my knitting pattern line’s #1 fan.

Laurie loved movies. We went out at least once or twice a year to Cinefamily (formerly the Silent Movie Theatre, aka where I got married), and to the Egyptian Theatre for the American Cinematheque’s Noir festival. This is the first year we missed it.

I feel like there is a hole in my chest.

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Because life goes on, I will also blog about the stuff I was planning to write about.

I finished sewing this in time for my friend Jim’s wedding:

100 Acts of Sewing Dress No. 1

100 Acts of Sewing Dress No. 1

I swear that huge wrinkle didn’t really show in person, and the pocket is sewn on evenly.

I flew to New York BY MYSELF overnight last Wednesday-Thursday. I bought a SIX DOLLAR MOCHA at JFK, then took the AirTrain to the A train and rode into Manhattan. I got off in the village and had breakfast with my dear friend Nova, then walked to the 1/9 and went up to Lincoln Center.

Lincoln Center, aka my favorite place on earth

Lincoln Center, aka my favorite place on earth

Tiny Amy met me there and we wandered up Amsterdam to 72nd street, where we got some amazing falafel at Soom Soom Vegetarian Bar. Then I headed to Grand Central Terminal and took a commuter train up the river.

View of the Hudson River from Metro-North near Sing Sing Penitentiary.

View of the Hudson River from Metro-North near Sing Sing Penitentiary.

I spent the long weekend with my mom. This is the first time I’ve been childfree since Sam was born, and the first time I’ve ever been away from Grace. The first night I slept twelve and a half hours (though to be fair, I’d only slept about two hours on the airplane).

It was nice to be back in Woodstock.

Forsythia

Forsythia

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In my grief and confusion today, I did not know what to do with myself. So naturally I signed up for Pottermore to get sorted.

HUFFLEPUFF, BITCHES. Common room next to the KITCHEN.

HUFFLEPUFF, BITCHES. Common room next to the KITCHEN.

This is so appropriate that I cannot even.

Meet Virginia

virginia-quad

Oh hi. I design knitting patterns occasionally.

Virginia is a modification of Ginger, with a contrast band, shorter headsize, and different brim. For a limited time, if you have already bought Ginger (or if you buy them together), Virginia is free.

In the next few weeks, I plan to release an ebook of four art deco cloche patterns: Ginger, Dorothy, Virginia, and a new one called Nora. Stay tuned!

No big deal.

Last week I worked my first game in stripes (only penalty calling refs wear stripes, and I had thusfar worked administrative, non-penalty calling positions).

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I was an Outside Pack Referee, which is the only referee position (besides Head Referee) that does not require skates.

So, uh. Guess what I am doing on May 18th.

If you said skating, you are incorrect. But if you said Head Refereeing a game…Yeah.

If you are so inclined, you can purchase tickets here. They are sold with tiered pricing, so if you purchase before May 1, tickets are $6 off, before May 8, $4 off, before May 15, $2 off. And that’s based on the already low Sunday afternoon prices.

I don’t want to imply that if you don’t come to the game, you aren’t really my friend. But that is totally true. (Local friends only. Far off friends may prove your love in other ways.)