Sour Grapes? Maybe, but oh well.

We interrupt your regularly scheduled Art posts for some rambling. I’ve edited this a gazillion times because I’m having trouble making my point. I hope I succeeded.

I had a little bit of a hissy fit on Twitter yesterday. It started off with what I meant as an offhand joke–something to the effect of, “My invitation for Blogger Prom got lost in the mail AGAIN!” It’s true, last year I was really offended that I wasn’t invited. Last year I was also pregnant, so I assumed my response was hormonal. Actually, it wasn’t the lack of an invitation that offended me so much as the fact that they invited their friends and then said that anyone who hadn’t received an invite should ask for one.

Guys? You’re doing it wrong. Making people ask to be part of a popularity contest? Gross. It is my opinion that either a) EVERYONE should have had to ask for an invite–not just people who were not in the inner circle–or b) it should have been truly invite-only, or c) it should have been totally open.

Still, people that I knew attended and had fun, and it really did sound like a good event. But I had a bad taste in my mouth.

This year, they announced another prom and did not suggest requesting an invite. I ignored it–figuring I’d either get one or not–until my silly tweet. At least people weren’t expected to ask for an invite this year.

My friend Nina replied, suggesting in not as many words that I lose the sour grapes and ask for an invitation next time. She was totally right, sort of. Yes, I would have loved to attend. But it was barely on my radar. And I was not at all on the Prom Committee’s radar.

Look. I spent years putting myself out there (though not with any particular motivation). If I am not known as a local blogger by now there’s nothing I can do about it. Honestly, it is not worth trying. I wrote for Metblogs for two years and I’ve had this blog since I moved here eight years ago. I have commented on and linked to blogs both popular and not, I’ve gone to events. (I still do most of this, but less so because it conflicts with being a hermit.) You know what I’ve learned? Online–just like everywhere else–some people are popular and some people are not, and nothing you do will change which one you are.

I am TOO BUSY with my actual LIFE to worry about whether I am popular. Do I wish I was? Not exactly, though I think it’s fucking retarded that I’m not. I AM AWESOME! But I am certainly not going to beg for it. What would be the point? I’d much rather enjoy the genuine friendships I’ve made through blogging.

After my exchange with Nina, I got an invitation to Blogger Prom, because the committee had seen my rantings. So I had to decide whether I would rather go on short notice or continue living my life without Prom.

Did I mention that it is TOMORROW? And it’s 1940s themed, which means I’d need a new dress? Yeah. I am broke, my babysitter has plans tomorrow, and it’s just not happening. I know I’d have fun if I attended, but only if I had more than 48 hours to prepare. So I’m not going. Besides, if I went I’d have to deal with worrying about whether someone had taken pity on me.

It’s too bad, because–as you might guess from the URL of my website–I’m pretty into the 40s.

I do hope I get an invitation next year, but I kind of don’t expect to. I really do think, though, that they should ditch the invites and make people buy tickets. Like, you know, Prom-prom.

I would probably buy one. Prom was fun.

7 thoughts on “Sour Grapes? Maybe, but oh well.

  1. Katherine

    September 21, 2010 at 6:30pm

    Well, not to knock those who are capital-B bloggers, but you are not your blog… and people who do shit like Blogger Prom are living their blogs and it’s a popularity contest, for sure.

    I think it might also be an SoCal/LA/New York thing, too, where “fame” and “class” matter. Where I’m from, nobody gives two shits if you’re a blogger unless you’re also a Venture Capitalist/Entrepreneur/Tech Guru/Start-Up Employee, which is it’s own ball of wax, to be sure, but it’s actually a much bigger pool of people than you’d expect. And they are usually too busy working and living to have events like Blog-Her or Blogger Prom, though I’m sure there is some overlap in that Venn Diagram.

    To sum up, it’s not sour grapes if you think the system is BALONEY. Which it is.
    .-= Katherine´s last post ..ART- Vs Craft =-.

  2. georgia

    September 21, 2010 at 8:14pm

    totally agree with you & K. and can i just add how much i hate it when people on twitter say stuff like “if you think i should be following you @ me and tell me why!” uh, how bout if i @ you to tell you to fuck off?

  3. Ewokmama

    September 21, 2010 at 11:15pm

    Well…I don’t even know what the heck you are talking about so there is that. :P

    Also, I’ve never been to prom. I didn’t do dances. I like ’em now though.
    .-= Ewokmama´s last post ..Funny Boy =-.

  4. Annika

    September 22, 2010 at 10:33am

    Sorry, this must sound like gibberish to like 90% of readers. Blogger Prom is a local thing.

    Crystal, I only went to prom because a friend of mine invited me to his–I didn’t have a prom of my own and almost certainly wouldn’t have gone if I did.

  5. Amy

    September 22, 2010 at 4:06pm

    While I would be delighted to see you in ’40s getup, I would say don’t go. Of course, this is because I wouldn’t go in your position. Because the only reason I would want to get an invitation to anything is so that I could decline. I have been angry about not receiving invitations I had been looking forward to declining.

    God I hope you’re not like me.

  6. Cindy

    September 22, 2010 at 7:58pm

    Well, not sure if this will make you feel better but I really, really want to see you in about 10 days. I’m going to be at Cassy’s on Sunday, Oct 3rd (I really need to message her with the details) and although I haven’t mentioned it to Cassy yet (guess I should get on that whole “contact Cassy” thing, huh?), I was hoping we could spend some time with your kidlets. Also, I have a Christmasy dress that Karlie never wore but it’s a size 18 mos. I don’t suppose it might be only a little big for Grace this Christmas? It still even has the tag on it.

  7. girlvaughn

    September 23, 2010 at 8:12am

    I saw your tweet and thought it was hilarious. I try not to get upset about not getting invited to things I don’t want to go to, but it’s still annoying.

    The cliques and popularity contests around these parts just make me roll my eyes. I would much rather just have a beer with you while you teach me how to knit.

    (side note – did you see the tweets sort of dissing blogger prom and talking about having blogger kegger instead. see you there!!)
    .-= girlvaughn´s last post ..30 Days of Truth- Day 1 =-.

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