Through The Looking Glass

If you sent me email yesterday (Wednesday 29 October) to my msn account, I did not get it. Apparently when you go over your account size limit, they stop delivering your mail (including, ironically, the “Your account is too large” email they send automatically). Bastards!

Hee. My account is too large. Tell that to the spammers who want me to make it bigger!

I refer, of course, to Daylight Savings Time. When it begins every spring, mornings are pure hell. When it ends every autumn, it is a struggle to stay up at night and maintain a normal sleep schedule.

I have a theory: this was never about the farmers. It is all about TORTURE.

Think about it: What is the clever saying to remember which way to turn the clock? “Spring forward, fall back.” First of all, it would be more accurate to say, “Spring forward, fall down.” Second of all, TORTURE.

If I were a farmer, I’d start working when the sun came up and stop when it set. The clock is irrelevant. Irrelevant.

I am so annoyed. Not to mention ready for bed.

I have never heard anyone who is not a homophobe say that they believe homosexuality to be a choice.

EDIT: If you are illiterate, or Matty, or both, here is an alternate version of the above sentence, just for you. I have only ever heard homophobes say that homosexuality is a choice.

You’ve been warned.

I don’t even like fantasy!

Clearly, this is a patent falsehood, particularly if Amazon.com is anyone to listen to on the subject. On “The Page You Made,” the following films (and television series) are prominently listed: The Princess Bride, Willow, X-Men, X2, Buffy the Vampire Slayer, Firefly, The Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers, The Indiana Jones trilogy, The Neverending Story…good gravy, it keeps going. Legend, The Goonies, The Matrix Reloaded… It would seem to the untrained eye that I am the World’s Biggest Fantasy Fan. Granted, I’ve seen (and loved) all but one of these, but that is irrelevant.

“There’s lots of ‘relevants in the circus.”

*sigh*

I miss my dad.

The weekend

Though exhausting, it was wonderful. Our room was upgraded to a suite, with a sitting room and sliding double doors and a huuuuuuge bed and it was wonderful. We were very decadent and ordered room service twice.

The wedding itself was just lovely, with the bride crying and the groom unable to repeat the “for better or for worse” part without screwing it up. He was so sweetly nervous. On Sunday morning, we met him briefly to fill out another of the forms (for a copy of the certificate, I think), and he was glowing. I want to get married right this minute.

Well, I suppose I’d like to shower first. And maybe have dinner. So what the hell, I guess I’ll wait until next year as planned.

Phoebe is hilarious

“I spend all my time when I’m unable to contact him wishing I were able to contact him, and all my time when I am able to contact him not feeling able to. It’s so frustrating being a teenage girl!”

Driving into the apocalypse

On the way to the wedding, we drove from downtown Los Angeles, which was clear and sunny, into Hell. The sky was grey and brown, the sun was a strange ball of orange. We passed two horrible accidents. That night, during the reception, we went out on a balcony. In the distance we could see what appeared to be the fires of Mount Doom. It was completely unreal, and beautiful. The air smelled sweet, like a campfire. It was raining ashes.

They’re saying that arson is a possibility. On the other hand, southern California ecosystems have natural fires. It is part of life. I cannot begin to understand why people would build their multi-million dollar homes in areas where these fires are known to occur.

Everything else

The house is still a mess, finances are still sticky (I had to turn down work because of the wedding), I cancelled a trip to Disneyland and am sad because I’ll be missing a chance to see Saren and Harper (and their parents), something’s wrong with the car, and I am hungry. Time to figure out what’s for dinner.

In conclusion,

Alias just keeps getting funnier and more ridiculous. Everwood just keeps getting better. And…that’s it for my TV watching lately. We did, however, get a DVD of some X-Files episodes from Netflix. If Will figured correctly, it includes the episode with Luke Wilson. YAY!

Yesterday we drove to Riverside for a rehearsal and rehearsal dinner for our friends Alan and Kim’s wedding. Riverside is a beautiful little historical town, and the Mission Inn, where the wedding will be, is absolutely stunning. Today we will be driving back for the wedding and spending the night. This time I am bringing extra shoes, though my feet may never forgive me for yesterday.

I don’t even know what I’m going to wear. Even worse, neither does Will, and he is performing the ceremony, which means he has to find something.

I am so far behind on everything. The house is filthy, I owe people email and letters and phone calls and who knows what else, I still haven’t finished reading books I started in June.

Ahhh. I love being able to update before I even post these things. UPDATE: I found something to wear. It’s this dress I bought at a Salvation Army a million years ago without even trying it on. Turns out that it fits, and I look extremely attractive in it. And the shirt that Will thought he couldn’t wear is actually fine. Phew!

In other news, Will is currently making me a second cup of coffee.

OK. I have to go throw in a load of laundry and pack for the night. I’ll be back sometime Sunday, presumably just in time to find out if I am correct in thinking that Sydney put the thing on Vaughn instead of on the other thing. (How’s that for a non-spoilery theory based on spoilery stuff? And I know I’m right, because Noah posted the same theory.)

Ugh. How hard can it be to find a ring, right? Men buy rings for women all the time, and the women tend to wear them.

Alas, it appears that all of the engaged women in the known universe either have dreadfully bad taste or men with top-secret connections.

Since I plan to wear this ring forever*, it seems to me that I ought to like it. It also needs to be within our budget (currently five cents and falling). So I’ve been looking for one myself.

All I want in this world (besides another Peppermint Patty – yum) is a bezel** set diamond with a thin, white gold band. I do not want the diamond to sit very high off my finger, and I’d prefer it to be small and imperfect, like me. Apparently, such a ring does not exist. I’m sure there are jewelers who could make such a ring to my specifications, but they charge for stuff like that, and besides, that would require actually finding a jeweler I like, as opposed to just finding a ring that I like.

*They’ll have to pry it off my cold, dead hands. Literally, as I plan to be a fat old lady.
**That’s rub over, for the non-Americans.

We just watched Alias. That is the dumbest show ever, and it is really growing on me. I like watching a show that I have no expectations for, because it always exceeds them.

I have a theory, but I can’t be bothered to spoiler-tag it at the moment, so nevermind. Anyway, as I said to Will, it is entirely possible that the show isn’t even as smart as me, which would mean they never thought of doing [the thing that my theory consists of].

I would say that my evening is much improved, but it’s all relative. While I was buying milk and a carrot (if you must know, I got two carrots), Will was hanging out with Vince Vaughn.

But I need milk! And a carrot! (No, really.) But on the other hand, I need to do some real grocery shopping (not that I plan to buy fake milk and a fake carrot, but hopefully you know what I mean), and I’ll probably do that tomorrow, so why can’t I just stay in my chair, wearing my dirty clothes that I’ve been wearing since yesterday and were probably already dirty when I put them on then, and stare at my computer some more, wishing that I hadn’t read all of Margaret Cho’s blog in one go, and just not worry about it? Why do I need milk and a carrot anyway? Oh yeah, so that I can have coffee in the morning, and finish dinner. And don’t tell me that my coffee will be fine black, or dinner will taste just as good without a carrot, because it isn’t true and you know it!

My dad is in New York right now, and I want to go hang out with him, because in the last five minutes or so I’ve entered one of my phases of really, really missing New York. And I miss my dad a lot too, but I always miss my dad, and I only miss New York occasionally.

Maybe if I had a car I wouldn’t get so restless, but on the other hand I’d probably still just sit at home, only on top of doing Notalot, I could add on some guilt over the expense of a second car, even one that isn’t being driven – especially one that isn’t being driven, because in that case what the hell am I insuring it against anyway?

I hope Will comes home soon, he usually knows what to do with me when I am feeling this way, and even if he does the wrong thing, there’s a chance that it will piss me off – and I hate to get pissed off at him, especially for things that are not his fault in any way, shape, or form, but at least I’d be feeling different, and I think he’d forgive me.

Restless isn’t a good word for how I’m feeling, but I don’t think there is one. At least, not in English, and so far that is the only language I have any complex understanding of.

I put Equillibrium back on our Netflix queue, and it will arrive soon, but not until I send back the movies that we haven’t even watched yet, because I haven’t fetched them from the mailbox, because I’m too lazy to get up out of my chair, even for a nap or a bath or something else that would make me feel better, nevermind to check the mail.

The good news is that the store is open 24 hours, and I can walk there, and it’s only 2 blocks away, unlike Ralphs which I won’t go to right now because they don’t respect the union. So I’ll go later.

CHUD is having a contest in which they are giving out passes to Alien (coming soon to a theater near you). Unfortunately, I don’t live in one of the cities they have passes for, so I thought I’d just answer them here, and buy my own ticket.

Ton [sic] win a chance at a pass, use the correct link below, include your mailing address, and tell me what you would do with Alien 5 if given the keys to the kingdom.

1. No Ripley. Look, I love Sigourney Weaver, even though my sweetheart really, really, really wants to have sex with her, but Ripley’s story is really, really, really over.
2. I’d like to see the story of someone else – say, Jonesy. That’s right, the cat. Oh, he’s dead? I suppose a few flashbacks would be acceptable.
3. The existing formula is basically that scientists are bad, because they want to experiment on the aliens rather than destroy them. Maybe it would work out better for the franchise if, rather than continuing that formula, we had a story from the scientists’ point of view. Maybe there is some actual gain to be had from studying these creatures – I don’t know, a cure for cancer or something. Or is that too X-Files?
4. I loved Alien Cubed, but it started off really crappily; let’s bring back Michael Biehn, OK?

In other news, either I’ve got Spyware on my machine or imdb has been hacked. I was going to double-check the cat’s name, but now I can’t be bothered.