Through The Looking Glass

Warning: this entry is about issues of a girly nature.

Dear Uterus,

What the hell is wrong with you? We had a lovely schedule worked out, and suddenly you’re being weird. Every three weeks? Isn’t that a bit extreme? I’m going to run out of fabulously expensive self-adhesive heating pads soon.

I am not amused.

As I am bigger than you, I feel that I should be in control. Get back on schedule, or else.

Dude, I totally forgot to tell you all: we got a couch! Or, more accurately, a loveseat. It is the weirdest color. I don’t know how to describe it – it almost looks as if someone spilled red wine, but very, very evenly. It’s fairly comfortable, not hideous, and generally OK. I would have preferred a pull-out, but this one was free. Free!

And now I must end this entry, as I am chatting with Saren and will soon be leaving for LAX to pick up my sister.

I am so witty. If only I could translate it to text.

Things I (almost) did today

• Filed my Federal Tax Return. This would have been in the (actually) done list, had I remembered to send my W2s to work with Will so he could mail everything.

• Sent a harsh letter demanding Will’s security deposit refund from the old apartment. This will be (actually) done tomorrow – I need photocopies made of a few things, and to visit the post office so I can send it certified.
• Ate before 4:00. I had some pretzels, but I don’t think it counts.
• Finished filling out all of the state and local forms. Hell, I don’t even have the local forms.

In conclusion, I suck. But K arrives tomorrow.

Dear Anne Rice,

I’ve never had anything but the most grudging respect for you, so I hope you’ll forgive this out-of-the-blue missive.

As you know, I find Lestat to be the most appallingly dull character ever to have several books devoted to him. However, I find it even more appalling to see him onscreen under the pseudonym “Spike” – or, more accurately, “William.”

I recommend suing David Fury, Drew Goddard, and Joss Whedon.

yours,
Bettie

Last night we went to the Beverly Cinema for a double feature of Evil Dead and Dead Alive.

The movies were great! Of course, I already knew that, but it was immense fun to see them in a theater – especially Dead Alive, which had an excellent audience reaction.

I hid my eyes a total of 3 times in 2 features. Not bad for a girly-girl.

My favorite part of Evil Dead was when the sound went out while Ash was in the basement. It was hilarious.

This may be the funniest, most clever thing I have ever read. I really adore Valerie – I should probably talk to her more. But then I’d have to get over that whole thing I have about talking to people I admire and sounding like a moron, which would be a great deal of trouble.

So probably not.

Dear IRS,

I don’t hate you anymore. Please send my $900 immediately. I’ve promised Will an action figure.

love & kisses,
bettie
(Please make the check out to Annika)

Thanks for all the gropes. I changed the name of my blog, but it refuses to show up. I got angry and threw my computer out the window*.

On Tuesday I made jerk chicken and assorted other Carribean goodies. It was so good.

*Not really.

*cries*