I accidentally clicked on a terrible “article” this morning. Between the text and the stock photographs I just had to improve it.
1. He is more interested in something up on the ceiling than in your advances. WHAT IS ON THE CEILING?
2. She’s yelling at you with a megaphone. PUT THE MEGAPHONE DOWN, LADY.
3. He is better at video games than you. Or even worse, he THINKS he is better at video games than you. LET HER HAVE THE CONTROLLER ONCE IN A WHILE, YOU CAD.
4. She pretends not to know you in public. DANGER!
5. She steals your sandwich. HE IS HUNGRY TOO, LADY.
6. You are both just too goth to live.
7. She leans on you when you’re trying to make a shot. WHAT THE HELL LADY HE IS TRYING TO MAKE A SHOT.
8. You are literally screaming in each other’s faces. Also maybe you are both Italian? I mean, look at that gesturing. Actually, you two should probably just go to bed together.